Which Wife? 03
“Ben! Ben! When did you get here, honey (kiss, kiss).”
“Oh, hey mom, um, I’ve been here for a minute or two, but damn momma, some of your friends seem so helpless and all, so. Anyways, it’s a great party as usual, so.”
“Oh honey, my social friends aren’t helpless and needy (well, they are, but I think Helen can hear us, so). Anyways, ugh, son, you know I don’t like that you drink those energy drinks!”
“Well, I’m just running low on energy, mom, I mean, you know how hard I work an all, so.”
“I know, honey, but listen, I have to tend to these old hens, so I have to run, um, but your old mom looks pretty good today, right?”
I mean, with mom’s money, her looking good was the easy part, but I’m the good son, so.
“Like a million bucks as usual mom, so watch out for the men around here.”
“Ahh, that’s why you’re my favorite son, but listen, um, if Mrs. Irving needs any, well, Ivy has special needs from time to time, so if she needs help finding the bathroom in the rec room in the basement and all, I mean, just help her down the basement steps and all, alright Ben? And no more energy drinks!”
Oh, well, I mean, since when did snooping around become a special bathroom needs and all, right? But whatever.
“Huh, you know what, Mrs. Irving, I have never ever called you Ivy, so hello Ivy, I’m happy to see you today and might I add that your dress sure seems to fit the theme of mom’s garden party and all, so.”
“Oh, um, thank you, Ben and my o my have you grown since that night I messed up and role played your Ironic Wife, right? I mean, it was quite ironic how I confused you for your uncle and sucked you off at your mom’s spring festival party, right Ben?”
“Ahh, it may have been a mistake, but my uncle’s loss was my gain, like what, twice?”
“Well, it was dark and all, so.”
“Anyways, I mean, what color pills would you be looking for today then, Mrs. Irving?”
“Oh, if my Ironic Wife memory serves me correctly, LOL, I don’t need any blue pills for you, but if your momma happens to have a few purple pills laying around, I mean.”
“Oh, oh, like deep purple or light purple then? And by the way, Mrs. Irving, you’ve yet to let your tits out for me, Ivy Irving or Ironic Wife style, so.”
“Well, let’s just go see about the color shade of those pills then, Ben.”
[Suckle, slurp, yum, um, um, oh, slurp, sucky, sucky, squeeze, massage, ooh, um, um, ow, ow, slurp.]
“Trade off with me, Ben, I have a mouth too, baby.”
[Slurp, slurp, lick, lap, lap, lap, lick, slurp, lick, kiss, kiss, kiss, gag, gag, ga, ga, ooh.]
“Swallow hard, Ironic Wife, make it count!”
[Gulp, swallow, ooh, gulp, swallow, gulp, um, hm, gulp.]
“Ben, I mean, my son Josh and you, right?”
“Oh, I would never let Josh know that you have been my amazing and hungry Ironic Wife since the days of our sleep overs, so.”
“Well, push that medium purple pill down my throat with your tongue then, Ben.”
[Mwah, ummah, mwah, umma, mwah, ow, ow, ag, ag, ag, ah, ug, ug, ug, ummah, mwah.]
“Oh, well, oh my, I mean, I’m at a wonderful party, so push another pill cide escort down my throat then. I mean, it says to take with food and you just filled my belly and all, so.”
[Mwah, ummah, mwah, umma, mwah, ow, ow, ag, ag, ag, ah, ug, ug, ug, ummah, mwah.]
“Whew, wow, I mean, don’t be such a stranger around my house then, but I should get a move on before someone starts asking questions.”
“LOL, like uncle Ted?”
“Well, I didn’t know that you were going to be here today Ben and all, but I promise and swear, I’m just your Ironic Wife and there will be mixing of proteins in my belly today, so????”
[Mwah, ummah, mwah, umma, mwah, ow, ow, ag, ag, ag, ah, ug, ug, ug, ummah, mwah.]
“Whew, I mean, Josh is still away at college, so stop around a little more, stud.”
“A few purple pills for the pocket, Mrs. Irving???”
“Well, I’ll make it up to you, Ben.”
I mean, I could stop by every now and then just to check up with Mrs. Irving’s wellbeing, right? I mean, Josh has even mentioned that before himself, so.
“Ouch!”
“What the hell happened, Mrs. Jenkins?”
“Oh, I mean, your mom and all of her fancy kitchen gadgets, right? I was just trying to use her fancy crinkle cut slicer on the watermelon pieces and my hand keeps slipping! I mean, just how in the hell does your mom do all of this stuff anyways, Ben? Is she Wonder Woman in disguise?”
Oh, Mrs. Jenkins was right about all the fancy kitchen gadgets that my mom owned, but don’t expect to read about me stepping in and saving the day. I mean, I have two sizes of kitchen knives at home and they both do it all, so.
“Oh, so, ooh, Ben, so you’re just going to suck on my injured finger then? I mean, oh, Ben, please tell me that you’re not so good at this because you’re gay and all, so.”
“Nope, no previous experience, Mrs. Jenkins, but your hands and fingers are just so, soft and dainty.”
“Well then, um, I mean, I mean, can I move my finger about?”
I mean, sometimes some questions just don’t need to be answered with words, right?
“Oh, SOB, I mean, wow, now my watermelon is feeling like it’s crinkle cut and all, so Ben, Ben, um, Ben, take me somewhere, Ben!”
Well, I at least cracked a window in my old bedroom before I left for the last time, so I was hoping that it didn’t reek of sex from the, holy smokes, like the last six times?
“Oh, Ben, Ben, are you sure that Dragon Wife is taken, Ben? I mean, everyday I would blow fire all over this wonderful man tool of yours, oh, Ben, Ben, oh, ahh, ooh. OMG, Ben, Ben, Ben, I know people Ben and Mrs. Darby can come up missing just like that, Ben, oh, Ben, Ben, Ben, I’ve never been sexed up like this before, Ben.”
“Lock your legs around me tight, Mrs. Jenkins so that your body goes with me as I increase my angle. I mean, I need a Jack Stand Wife right now, Mrs. Jenkins.”
[Wrap, wrap, lock, lock, check, hah, locked in tight.]
“OMG, OMG, (I’m still getting rid of that bitch though), oh, Ben, OMG, Ben, I’ve never been fucked before, Ben. OMG, OMG, Ben, Ben, ooh, ooh, ha, ha, ha, ha, I’m your Jack Stand Wife then, Ben, jack hammer me çiftlikköy escort home, Ben.”
Wait, wait, whoa, did she say that she knows people? I mean, Mr. Jenkins has always seemed like someone you wouldn’t want to mess with, so.
“Hmmm, Ben, that was amazing, Ben (mwah).”
Oh, so now I have to linger in bed with the mafia boss’s wife then? I mean, generally speaking, that tight leg lock thing usually releases just after it’s over, right?
“Brand the back of neck, Ben and confirm that I’m your Jack Stand Wife and all, baby. (And be ready to rename me as your Dragon Wife soon enough or swim the fishes).”
“Oh, um, I’ve never really smoked in my old bedroom before, Mrs. Jenkins, but I think we should make one of the quick exists. I mean, for the thrill of it all, right babe?”
Well, no man ever turned down a quick clean up, right?
“(Mwah), give my ass a quick a pat outside later, lover.”
Ah, sure, right? I mean, I need to get things in order in my head because that was a common request for the day, but sure, why not, right?
“What the hell, young man? You look dazzled, frazzled, disheveled, delirious and generally worn out, so what’s going on, Ben?”
“OMG, Mrs. Kennedy, it’s just working so much and then every lady here today needed help with this and that and before I knew it, I was dazzled, frazzled, disheveled, delirious and generally worn out, so.”
“Well, you’re young and your mother needs all the help that she can get with a garden party of this size, so you just hang in there and keep at it, Ben.”
“Oh, there’s no quit in my game, Mrs. Kennedy, I mean, I just need another red raspberry energy drink and a Kinky Wife and I’m good to go.”
“Oh, oh my, I mean, whew, I mean, just how kinky of a Kinky Wife do you need, Ben?”
“Oh, I need a big time Kinky Wife, Mrs. Kennedy. I mean, I’ve never had butt sex with a woman before, so???”
“Oh, sweetie, I mean, that’s just a Thursday night for me. Now, if you ever get the notion to tie me to a chair with rope and duct tape and leave me that way for the next man who walks through the door, well sweetie, you just text me. But study on the roping technique’s babe, they are not as easy as one, two, three and all, so????”
OK folks, um, I’m going to pass on the Kinky Wife for a while. I mean, I was never a scout or anything, so, I’m passing all that for the moment.
“(Mwah), check out my secret bondage page on Chang, Ben. Just search for Kinky Ms. Kennedy and you know, browse around a little, Ben.”
I mean, man the bar, right? Take to behind the bar and keep the drinks flowing, right (he, he)? Oh, holy out of my league Kinky Wife snap!
“See Ben? Mrs. Williams didn’t even know that I was kneeling behind the bar and sucking off your most wonderful cock, so????”
“Um, I’ll follow you Chang, Mrs. Kennedy, I promise.”
“Hmmm, am I your Kinky Wife now, Ben?”
“The one and only, Mrs. Kennedy, the one and only.”
“Um, alright, so follow me on Chang and search the rope tying technique’s and you know, look around to see if any ball gags catch your fancy, sweetie.”
I çınarcık escort mean, I said that I’m holding off on the Kinky Wife thing, right?”
“Talking to yourself these days, Ben?”
“Oh, um, Mrs. Linder, um, maybe, but the energy drinks and all, right? Um, here, one special garden party ice tea.”
“(Sip) HOLY that burns snap, Ben! Geez, Louise!”
“Yeah, yeah, I know, don’t quit my day job, so.”
“Well, wow, your words, Ben. So, tell me true, Ben, is this awkward today?”
“Mrs. Linder, I mean, um, I mean.”
“It’s fine, Ben, I’m sure lots of younger males whack off with stolen panties and all. I mean, I am admitting that I stuffed them into your back pack after we all took that boat ride down the river last year, so, are you man enough to admit that you caught me stuffing them into your back pack, yet said nothing, hm-mmm?”
“Well, what the hell was I supposed to say at that point, Mrs. Linder?”
“Well, you were correct to not say anything on the spot, but I was hoping for a phone call within a few days to, you know, explain things to me, so?”
“You mean like phone sex, Mrs. Linder?”
“Oh, so you do get it then, Ben and with details too, but that was last summer, so.”
“Well, I didn’t know that there was a Loose Wife available, Mrs. Linder, so.”
“Hmmm, I don’t like the title of Loose Wife, Ben because it’s just about you and I, so. Oh, and I’m just a little beyond being a Limber Wife too, so.”
“Alright, Mrs. Linder, how about if you become my Lantern Wife then? I mean, with the way you have managed your 30 something female figure and all, I mean, not many of these women can hold a candle to you, so?”
“Oh, well, I did lucky with that metabolism thing, didn’t I then? So, alright, but I’m not going to fuck you Ben, so if you want to change that to Lantern Girlfriend, you may do so. I mean, you can rip my undies off and you can whack your fat stick at me anywhere you want do, but between crawling between my legs is off limits, so?”
Huh? I had never heard of such a thing, but everybody has their own thing, right? I was also shocked that Mrs. Linder said I could jack off anywhere on her! I mean, that only happens in Chang memes, right? Not that I had much left in me for the day, right?
“OMG, Ben, you mother fucker, I mean, Ben, with the way you wrapped my ripped undies around your fat stick and slammed yourself into me, OMG, Ben, Ben, Ben, why didn’t you fuck me two years ago? OMG, OMG, is this on video, Ben? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, I’m your Lantern Wife, Ben, fuck me proper like your Lantern Wife, Ben, ooh, ow, ow, ow, ow, OMG, Ben, Ben, I’m leaking Ben, Ben, OMG, pump my pussy, Ben, pump me hard baby!”
“Best condom ever Mrs. Linder and I thought of it myself, ooh, ooh, ugh, ugh, grunt, ooh, OMG, this is wet, Mrs. Linder!”
“Shut it and fuck me, Ben, shut it and juice me up, sweetie! Juice me right through my own undies!”
“Ugh, ugh, hump, hump, say it Lantern Wife, say it, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.”
“Oh, OMG, my pussy will always be, ooh, ooh, ooh, available to you and ooh, ooh, ooh, I’ll suck you any time, ooh, ooh, ooh, any place, Ben, ow, ow, ow, ooh.”
“And???”
“Ooh, ooh, oh, oh, um, I’m your Dragon Wife in waiting, ooh, ooh, ooh, baby.”
I mean, sometimes you just like to hear the words, right folks? I mean, that’s sweet music to the ears, am I right?
End Which Wife? 03
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